This Workout'll Kill You: <i>Aerobicide</i>, aka <i>Killer Workout</i>

This Workout'll Kill You: Aerobicide, aka Killer Workout

I recently revisited Aerobicide (1987), also known as Killer Workout, a film that's usually considered a fairly unremarkable example of the slasher genre. The plot is straightforward enough: a mysterious killer is murdering people at a posh Hollywood health spa. His or her weapon of death? A large safety pin, of course. I mean, if that isn't remarkable, I don't know what is.

While the film's plot might be simple, the final act makes tries to throw in a bunch of shocker twists, none of which make a lick of sense. The acting throughout is mostly forgettable, except when star Marcia Karr glares menacingly at everyone, which she does in almost every scene. She's glorious as Rhonda, owner of the aptly named Rhonda's Workout. There are also some laughably silly fight scenes between big burly dudes with mullets. The kill scenes are quick and dirty, nothing too memorable.

If this all sounds like I'm telling you Aerobicide isn't worth your time, that is so not the case. It is most definitely worth a watch (or several), especially if you like to laugh out loud at hilariously over the top late-period slasher movie nonsense like I do. How can you not love lines like, "Just teach the class and stop showing off your tits and your tight little ass!" Or this gem: "Tell that college boy that if he doesn't have that report ready in 30 minutes, I'm going to go over there and do an autopsy on his face! You got that?"

And, frankly, I've buried the lede here. While there are plenty of kills and jump scares, the film's main intent seems to be to fill as much of its running time with gratuitous shots of thrusting butts and boobs as possible. You see, the aerobics scenes act as framing devices around the rest of the film's action. After jump scares or kill shots, the film almost always cuts to long—very long—scenes of women doing aerobics while the camera lingers like a drooling peeping tom on their aerobicized asses, bodacious bosoms, and sculpted stems.

Honestly, instead of wasting all these words, I should've just used GIFs to tell the review. In the case of Aerobicide, they definitely speak louder than words! So, I'll shut my yap now. Here are the main reasons why this film will always be a late-night cult favorite.

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